I sent this email to my brother yesterday...
Hey hey hey Fredrico. John and I have your name for Christmas. I have been thinking for a long time about what to get you. I am a little stumped. Can you give me a few ideas? Do you need something for your house, kitchen? Do you have a Sonicare toothbrush? Do you have a movie that you wished you owned? Do you need me to come put a scary gross wig in your bed?
You may be asking...what? Scary gross wig? What in the heck is she talking about?
Right after I sent the message my phone rang. It was my brother, and we had a good laugh and reminisced about the scary gross wig.
A few years ago, Jared was living at my parents house. I went over to their house, and for some reason my mom's "grocery sack full of wigs" was out of storage. This grocery sack is full of matted, old, musty, scare-ball, hair-ball wigs. Back in the day my mom would wear a few of the hair pieces when it was in style. Jared and I had a good time looking at all the hair pieces and commenting on how disgusting they were. Suddenly, we can across a particularly gross wig that was in desperate need of a hot oil treatment. We were so totally grossed out by it. To make matters worse, we looked inside the wig and found that I was labeled "real human hair". Can you say Heebie Jeebies? Immediately neither one of us wanted to touch it. We kept chasing each other around with it and throwing at each other.
So, I plotted an evil plan. When Jared left for a moment, I ran the wig up to his bedroom and put it in the covers of his bed. When he returned I almost could help myself from laughing. I left and was so excited to see how my evil plan worked.
The next morning bright and early my phone rang. It was Jared and the first words out of his mouth were, "Your dead". The best part of this story is....When Jared climbed into bed that night, he did it with the lights off. He did not notice the wig in the bed with him. He slept with the wig allllll night. Just rolling around and cuddling with it. The next morning, he could feel something underneath him. He rolled over and found the wig!! Classic!!
For a while after that when I would climb in bed, I would pull the blankets up high and look all the way to the bottom of the bed. From time to time, I still do it, knowing that my scary wig friend will someday be there to greet me.